33 Thank You For Visiting Note Messages

A Family Visiting

After someone visits with you, you may want to thank the friend or family member for visiting.

I have included the examples below that will help you with the wording to say thank you to someone after they visit. The message ideas will help you express your gratitude and appreciation.

If you were the guest and want to thank the host, read the “ Thank you for having me over ” post.

Note: The sample messages are for personal visits at homes to thank someone for visiting, not for when someone visited a business, restaurant, event, fundraiser, etc.

I prefer writing a handwritten thank-you note card, but you could also send a thank-you email or text message.

Thank You For Visiting Message Template

You can use this template to thank guests after they visit you.

Dear [Person’s Name],

Thank you for visiting [me/us] [say here when they visited (ex. last week)]. I enjoyed spending time with you [and your family – or whoever else came along]. [Mention more about the visit, perhaps from the list above].

Please stop by again [if you want them to – or say “Thanks Again” instead]

[Your Name]

Note: fill in words in [brackets] as needed for your note.

What to Thank the Visitor(s) For

Here are a few suggestions of what you could thank your family or friends for after they visit you.

  • Travel time if they came from a distance.
  • Any food, dessert, or treat they brought (you make want to review the thank you for the cookies examples too)
  • The great conversation, quality time, or something you learned.
  • Anything fun you did together during the visit.
  • The laughter and good times!

Tips for Your Thank-You Note Messages

Here are some more tips for saying thank you for a visit.

  • Most people enjoy compliments, so consider including one.
  • Be as specific as possible about what you are thanking the person for.
  • If the visit was for a holiday, such as Christmas, Thanksgiving, your birthday, another event, or another special occasion, you could modify the examples to include appropriate wording. For example, adding “birthday” before the word “visit.”
  • You can also mention future visits if you plan to meet again soon.
  • Please read through all the examples, as you can pick and choose wording that will work best for you when you write your note. You want the message to sound like things you would say and not like you copied a random example from the Internet.
  • If you write a handwritten note or email, include all the thank-you note parts. For example, you can see all five parts of a thank you note here or follow the template below:

Thank You For Visiting Me Message Examples

Use these examples to help you say thank you for visiting me.

#1 Thanks for visiting me last week. The cookies were wonderful, and our conversation was delightful. I enjoyed every minute of the visit and looking forward to seeing you again in a few weeks.

#2 Thanks a lot for visiting me! Hearing about your life and all the things you do brightens my day. [In your note, mention something specific that was shared so your note doesn’t feel generic.]

#3 I want to share how much I enjoyed visiting you at [new restaurant name or another place]. We have so much fun chatting, and it’s a bummer when it’s time to leave. You are an empathic listener too! I look forward to our future dinners and hearing your advice about my [career issues].

#4 I am thankful for our time together on Wednesday visiting. You were my best neighbor, and I appreciate it when you stop to see me when you are in town. The chocolate truffles were fantastic too. I thought of you each time I had one this week. Please visit again soon!

#5 The travel stories you shared last week during your visit fascinated me. The places you go to sound exotic, and you are an excellent storyteller. I am thankful for our time together when you are in town. The treats you brought back from [vacation location] were fantastic too.

#6 I enjoyed our lovely visit at my house last weekend. And thank you for making all the meals. You are an excellent cook, and I appreciated the break. The chicken pizza was my favorite. You may be the perfect house guest! Thank you for making the trip from [far away place] to come and see me.

#7 I want to let you know I am grateful you visited me last Saturday. You are the best! Losing my cat [or other pet] was difficult. However, since you also love cats and have lost some, I felt like you understood the challenging time I am going through more than others.

#8 Thank you for coming over to answer my questions about money. I appreciate your advice on how I could get started with investing. Please know how much I appreciate your efforts to help me feel comfortable talking about money. My finances are finally headed in the right direction!

#9 I want to share how much our visit meant to me on Monday evening from the bottom of my heart. Our friendship means a lot to me, and I hope we can meet more often. Chatting with you in person always feels lovely, but finding times that work for both of us can be difficult.

#10 I am grateful that you were finally able to meet [Person’s Name] when you stopped by my home last weekend. It made my day! He’s heard so much about you and the fun times we had growing up. And we are both excited that you will attend our wedding next year.

#11 Thanks for coming to visit me. You are a good friend, and your time with me is appreciated. There is nothing like the way you can cheer me up! Also, playing checkers with you brought back pleasant memories from our childhood. I hope we will be friends forever.

#12 I love our long visits. Thank you for coming to chat and laugh with me. As you know, it’s hard for me to go places, so I’m happy whenever you can visit my home. Our friendship is good for my heart. And thank you for the homemade treats as well. They are great!

#13 Thank you for coming to my house! I enjoyed our visit very much and enjoyed our laughter. Let’s get together again soon. You’re a wonderful friend.

#14 Thanks for coming over. I was happy to have the chance to get to know you better. Thank you for bringing the lovely spread of meats, cheese, and crackers. I was delighted to have a few snacks while we visited.

#15 Thanks for your visit. I had a great time learning more about each other. We are going to be great friends!

Thank You For Visiting Us Message Examples

Use these examples to help you say thank you for visiting us.

#1 Thank you for visiting us. [Spouse/Partner Name] and I were excited that you stopped by with your family to see your parents when you were in town.

#2 Thank you for visiting our home. We were delighted to have you and your family over and hope everyone had a great time. I was happy to get to know you better and glad we met at [place where you met]. Let’s plan another date for a visit soon.

#3 Thank you for making the long drive to visit us. We are grateful for your presence whenever you have the time to see us. The chocolate chip cookies that you made were delicious. And we enjoyed petting your new dog. He seems like an excellent travel companion. But, most of all, we appreciated the conversation and hearing about your life [you could make this more specific in your note].

#4 Thank you for coming to [city where you live] to visit it. We appreciate that you are willing to travel so far to see us. The time we spent together at the amusement park was super fun, and we are excited that you’d like to make it an annual tradition. So let’s plan for it!

#5 We had a wonderful time visiting with you and your family at the event [say what even in your note]. I am writing to express my gratitude to you for noticing us. Chatting with you was refreshing. We invite you to visit our home for a longer visit next month.

#6 Thank you for visiting us. We had fun showing you around town and taking you to our favorite places. We hope you enjoyed the time spent together as much as we did. Please visit us again soon.

#7 We were happy to see you over the weekend. Thank you for stopping by to visit with us for a few hours. We are grateful for the time spent together.

#8 Thank you for visiting us on short notice. We enjoyed seeing your family and the great conversation.

#9 Thank you for visiting us yesterday. We are thankful that you could see us while you were in town. Hearing about your family and what’s happening in your lives made our day.

#10 Stopping to see us last weekend was thoughtful. Losing our son has been a tough time. Your visit was a blessing to us. We are grateful that you wanted to hear about him. You are a true friend.

#11 Thank you for visiting with us last night. We were happy you joined us when we saw you come into Olive Garden. It’s always a blessing to spend time with you two. We love you so much.

Holiday or Other Special Day Visit Examples

Your wording for saying thank you for visiting can mention the holiday, birthday, or another special day.

#1 Thank you for the [holiday] visit. We enjoyed our time together. The food you brought [say what the food was] was delicious. I hope we can see each other again before next [holiday].

#2 Thank you for the Christmas visit. I had a lovely time talking with me and hearing about your family. The brownies were excellent too.

#3 We were excited to see you on Halloween. It was a pleasant surprise when you brought the kids to trick-or-treat at my house. The short visit was refreshing, as we love to see your kids. They have so much energy, and little [Kid’s name] always seems joyful! She loved showing me her costume.

#4 We had a good time visiting with you [on/at] [special occasion – say what it was]. We always have a great experience meeting new people and making friends attending this event. It was our pleasure to meet you, so thank you for coming.

#5 Thank you for visiting me on my birthday! I appreciate our friendship and would like to get together more often. Let me know if you’d like to meet for dinner soon.

#6 Seeing you on Easter was great! Thank you for coming over to my place after the church service. The family enjoys your presence, and you’re welcome to join us whenever you’d like.

#7 Thank you very much for visiting me on my birthday. I know you have a busy life, and I appreciate that you made time to stop by. The flowers are beautiful too. I will keep them on the table for as long as possible and think of you when I see them. I feel blessed to have you in my life.

Related Posts:

  • Thank You for Dinner Example Messages
  • Thanks for Having Me or Us Over Examples

Heidi Bender

Author: Heidi Bender

Title: writer, expertise: thank you notes.

Heidi Bender is a writer and author who founded Tons of Thanks. She aims to help people write thank-you notes by providing examples and tips. She is the author of She is the author of A Modern Guide to Writing Thank-You Notes.

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Come visit/ Come to visit

  • Thread starter dwarf79
  • Start date Dec 23, 2010
  • Dec 23, 2010

Hi everyone, Is there any difference between come visit and come to visit ? I would like you to come (to) visit me at my place. I will come (to) visit you in India. These cases above sound better to me using to, but I've seen lots of similar phrases written without to. Can both ways be used without distinction? Does it depend on the context or the formality? Thanks!  

Bigote Blanco

Senior member.

Hola Dwarf, I think either way is commonly spoken and heard. However, I would say: I would like you to come visit me at my place. (no specific reference to location) or I would like you to come to Paris and visit me at my place. (I'd use "to" when speaking about a specific location for the visit to occur.) I would like you to come to my place for a short visit. I will go visit you in India. (come/go distinction) I will go to India and discuss the subject with you. Would you please come to my office for a short visit. Would you please come to my place for a short visit. Would you please come for a short visit. I will go to New York next week and ...... Will you come to New York next week and............  

Thank you very much for your answer Bigote Blanco  

lairlandesa

I also think the idea is that 'come visit' (come + verb) come to India = verb + noun Come visit is also American English versus Come to visit or come and visit is more European.  

  • Jan 22, 2015

Is it also correct to say " come + verb + place (without "to")" "please come visit Manila when you have time" or "please come visit here in Manila" Please advise, thank you.  

Come Visit Or Come And Visit: Which Is Correct?

If you’re reading this, chances are you’re trying to find the answer to this question, and you’re not alone. Many people struggle with choosing the right phrasing when it comes to this expression. But don’t worry, I’m here to help.

I know just how important it is to use the right language to effectively communicate your message. That’s why in this article, we’ll explore the nuances of ‘Come Visit’ and ‘Come And Visit,’ and help you choose the right one for your specific situation.

We’ll also examine their usage in everyday conversation, and provide examples of each to help you understand the difference.

So whether you’re a writer, marketer, or simply someone looking to improve your language skills, this article has something for you. So let’s get into it.

Which Is Grammatically Correct, And Why?

One of the questions that frequently comes up is whether it’s grammatically correct to say ‘come visit’ or ‘come and visit’. So, which is correct and why?

The short answer is that ‘come and visit’ is grammatically correct. The reason for this is that ‘and’ is a coordinating conjunction that is used to join two independent clauses

In this case, ‘come’ and ‘visit’ are both independent clauses and ‘and’ is necessary to join them together.

On the other hand, ‘come visit’ is technically a sentence fragment. While it’s commonly used in conversation and informal writing, it’s not considered proper grammar.

In formal writing, it’s important to use the full form ‘come and visit’.

It’s worth noting that this is a relatively minor issue, and most people won’t even notice if you use ‘come visit’ instead of ‘come and visit’.

However, if you want to ensure that your writing is grammatically correct and polished, it’s best to err on the side of caution and use the full form.

For example, in some dialects or regional variations of English, it’s common to drop the ‘and’ in phrases like ‘come visit’. Additionally, in poetry or creative writing, there’s often more leeway with grammar and syntax.

In summary, ‘come and visit’ is the grammatically correct form of the phrase, and should be used in formal writing or when you want to ensure that your writing is polished.

However, there are exceptions to this rule, and in some dialects or creative contexts, ‘come visit’ may be acceptable.

Why Is Come And Visit Us Used? 

Have you ever seen a sign or an advertisement that says ‘Come and visit us’? Maybe you’ve heard a friend or a family member use that phrase when inviting you over to their house. But have you ever wondered why we use this particular phrase?

First and foremost, the phrase ‘Come and visit us’ is a friendly and inviting way to ask someone to spend time with you.

Whether it’s a business inviting potential customers to check out their products or services, or a friend inviting someone over for dinner, ‘Come and visit us’ is a warm and welcoming way to extend an invitation.

Another reason why ‘Come and visit us’ is used is that it can help create a sense of community and belonging.

When a business or organization invites people to visit them, they’re inviting people to become a part of their community and to experience what they have to offer.

Similarly, when a friend invites someone to their home, they’re inviting them to be a part of their personal community and to share in their life experiences.

In conclusion, the phrase ‘Come and visit us’ is used because it’s a warm and welcoming way to invite someone to spend time with you.

It has its roots in Middle English and Latin, and it can help create a sense of community and belonging.

So, the next time you see a sign or hear someone say ‘Come and visit us,’ remember that it’s more than just an invitation – it’s an invitation to connect and build relationships.

Why Is Come Visit Us Used?

‘Come visit us’ is a phrase that has been used for decades, and for good reason. It is a simple, yet effective way to encourage people to physically visit a location, whether it be a store, restaurant, or any other type of business.

One of the main reasons why ‘come visit us’ is such a popular phrase is because it appeals to our human need for connection.

In today’s digital age, it’s easy to feel disconnected from the world around us. We spend so much time on our phones and computers that we forget about the importance of face-to-face interactions.

By inviting people to come visit a physical location, businesses are able to create a sense of community and connection that is hard to replicate online.

Of course, the effectiveness of ‘come visit us’ as a call-to-action also depends on how it is used. It’s important for businesses to be creative and come up with unique ways to use this phrase in their marketing efforts.

For example, a restaurant may use ‘come visit us for our daily specials’ or ‘come visit us to try our new menu items’.

By incorporating specific details, businesses can make this phrase more compelling and increase the chances of people actually visiting.

How Is Come And Visit Us Used In A Sentence? 

‘Come and visit us’ is a commonly used phrase that can be used in a variety of contexts. From personal invitations to business advertisements, this phrase has become a staple in our everyday language.

Here, we’ll take a closer look at how ‘come and visit us’ is used in a sentence and explore some of the different ways this phrase can be incorporated into your everyday communication.

Let’s start with the basics. The phrase ‘Come and visit us’ is often used to convey a sense of urgency or enthusiasm in an invitation.

By using the conjunction ‘and,’ we emphasize the invitation and make it sound more welcoming and informal.

For example, if you’re inviting a friend to come over to your house, you might say ‘Come and visit us!.’

The use of ‘and’ here conveys a sense of excitement and enthusiasm, which makes your friend feel more welcome and appreciated.

  • Personal Invitation: ‘Hey, why don’t you come and visit us next weekend? We’d love to have you over for dinner.’

Come Visit Or Come And Visit

Another common usage of ‘Come and visit us’ is in a business or commercial setting. Companies often use this phrase in their advertising campaigns to encourage customers to visit their store, office, or website.

The use of ‘and’ here conveys a sense of urgency and importance, which makes the invitation sound more compelling.

For instance, a store might say ‘Come and visit us for our end-of-season sale!’ or a website might say ‘Come and visit us for the latest deals and discounts!’

The use of ‘and’ in both these examples adds emphasis and encourages the customer to take action.

  • Business Advertisement: ‘Come and visit us at our new location and see our latest products in person!’

Come Visit Or Come And Visit

Finally, ‘come and visit us’ can be used to create a sense of community and belonging.

Whether you’re inviting someone to your home or encouraging them to check out your business, this phrase communicates a sense of openness and inclusivity.

It invites people to become a part of your community and to share in your experiences. Here’s an example:

  • Creating Community: ‘We’re having a neighborhood block party next weekend. Come and visit us and get to know your neighbors!’

Overall, the phrase ‘Come and visit us’ is a versatile and effective way to invite someone to visit you, whether in a personal or professional setting.

The use of ‘and’ adds emphasis, urgency, and warmth to the invitation, making it sound more genuine and appealing.

How Is Come Visit Us Used In A Sentence?

Let’s take a closer look at the usage of ‘Come visit us.’ Unlike ‘Come and visit us,’ the phrase ‘Come visit us’ does not use the conjunction ‘and,’ which makes it sound more direct and straightforward.

The phrase ‘Come visit us’ is commonly used when the invitation is more formal or professional in nature.

For example, if you’re inviting a colleague or business partner to your office, you might say ‘Please come visit us at our headquarters.’

The use of ‘Come visit us’ in this context conveys a sense of professionalism and formality, which is appropriate for a business setting.

In addition to being used in a professional setting, ‘Come visit us’ can also be used in a personal setting to invite friends or family to visit.

For example, if you’re inviting a friend to your home, you might say ‘Come visit us this weekend.’ The use of ‘Come visit us’ in this context conveys a sense of warmth and hospitality, which is appropriate for a personal invitation.

Another common usage of ‘Come visit us’ is in the context of travel and tourism. Cities and countries often use this phrase to invite tourists to visit their destination.

For example, a tourism board might say ‘Come visit us in sunny California!’ The use of ‘Come visit us’ in this context conveys a sense of excitement and invitation, which is appropriate for attracting tourists.

  • Tourist Attraction: “If you’re ever in town, be sure to come and visit us at the local museum. We have some amazing exhibits on display.”

Overall, the key to using ‘Come visit us’ in a sentence is to keep it simple, direct, and inviting.

Whether you’re using it in a personal or business context, this phrase is an effective way to communicate your desire to spend time with others and build relationships.

So, the next time you’re extending an invitation, consider using ‘Come visit us’ as a warm and welcoming way to invite others into your life.

The answer to the question ‘Come Visit’ or ‘Come and Visit’: Which is correct?’ is that both are acceptable and commonly used in different contexts.

‘Come visit’ is a more casual and friendly invitation, often used among friends and family. It can also be used in marketing or advertising to create a sense of personal connection with the audience.

‘Come and visit,’ on the other hand, is a more formal invitation, often used in professional or business settings. It can also be used to emphasize the importance of the invitation or to convey a sense of urgency.

Ultimately, the choice between ‘come visit’ and ‘come and visit’ depends on the context and the tone you want to convey.

Both are grammatically correct, and the important thing is to use the one that feels most appropriate for the situation.

So, next time you’re inviting someone to come over, consider your relationship with them and the context of the invitation.

Whether you choose ‘come visit’ or ‘come and visit,’ make sure to do so with a friendly and inviting tone that will make your guests feel welcome and appreciated.

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15 Ways to Respond to ‘Come Visit Me’

The best response you can give when someone says, “Come visit me,” will largely depend on who the person is and what kind of relationship you have with him or her.

Generally, I’d recommend you say something like “Lovely, of course!”  and then either change the meeting venue (if you aren’t comfortable with the proposed one) or simply defer to a different time and place.

This is necessary if the intention of the invitation feels suspicious and you need more time to engage in further conversation to understand the person more.

However, I’ve been in even more “complicated” situations, so I understand what it feels like to want to think outside the box and come up with a more suitable response to fit the context.

If you are in such a situation, then any of these 15 responses will be handy for when next someone says ‘come visit me

Table of Contents

1. “I’d love to! Let me check my schedule and I’ll get back to you with some dates.”

This is a sound response to give when someone asks you to come over and you’re interested in visiting the person but need to check your availability first.

It is also a smart way to make yourself the dictator over ‘when’ the visitation should happen since the person is already proposing the ‘where.’

2. “I appreciate the invitation, but I’m unsure if I can make it at this time.”

There is no harm in politely turning down an invitation if it doesn’t align with your priorities at that time. If you cannot visit the person, first appreciate the fact that they thought to invite you, and then let them know you are not available.

You don’t necessarily have to close it with an explanation or promise; just end it there and see what he/she says.

3. “I’d rather hang out somewhere else, what about (insert your preferred venue/activity)?”

Another way to respond to “come visit me” with a motive to decline politely is to provide an alternative. Instead of saying a blatant “no, I can’t,”  you can suggest another way for you both to see each other.

So, say you’d rather hang out somewhere else, then immediately suggest your preferred activity and see if they agree.

4. “I’d like to get to know you a bit better before I go over to your place.”

Is it someone you barely know? Are you getting to know the person, and then they request that you come over? Then let them know how uncomfortable you feel about the invitation.

It means you won’t be able to come to visit them anytime soon. And if you like, you can request that you both plan something for the future after your acquaintance has grown.

5. “Sure, I’d love to come visit. Give me more details about when and where, would you?”

You can express your interest and excitement over the invitation by asking for more details on where and when (the person’s address). It gives the impression that you are ready to visit them.

It is a better way to accept an informal invitation from a friend or colleague than simply saying “yes, I will visit you”

6. “If food is involved, I’m in”

Ways to Respond to Come Visit Me

There are many ways to accept an invitation, and being a little bit funny in your response is one of them.

When someone asks you to visit them and you ask if food is involved, it doesn’t necessarily send the impression that you are only interested in a good meal at their place; it’s a light-hearted way to say you accept, and who wouldn’t understand that?

7. “Why do you want to see me?”

You can play a little hard to get, especially if the request is coming from something you like. Asking “why” is also a good way to know the person’s intention behind the invite and to engage in further conversation that could reveal more information about the visit.

It could be because the person’s family will be around and wants to introduce you to them, or they have an exclusive house party or need your company.

8. “Oh, do you?”

You can use this response when someone invites you to visit them and you want to accept but tease them.

By replying with this question, it gives the impression that you are trying to pull their legs, even though you’ve been expecting them to make this request all the while. However, it best suits a texting scenario.

9. “I bet you ask that from other girls (or guys) you’re talking to”

This is another hard-to-get response to give when someone asks you to visit them. You want to accept, but you don’t want to do so too easily so that you aren’t perceived as someone who accepts whatever is suggested to them.

10. “I’m not sure if I’ll be able to make it, but I’ll let you know as soon as possible.”

This is an open-ended way to decline someone’s request when he or she asks you to visit them. By giving this response, you are keeping them aware of your unavailability and making a promise to make it up to them when you get the chance.

I recommend using this response when you are unsure about visiting the person but want to notify them as soon as possible.

11. “I’m sorry, but I won’t be able to come to visit, but let’s find another way to hang out soon.”

It is normal to feel uncomfortable going to someone’s house for the first time, especially when you’ve not had enough time to get to know the person well.

Even if you do, you’d prefer other ways to meet with the person before accepting a home visit. The above response helps you express this position politely. It is similar to the decline-and-provide-an-alternative response we highlighted earlier.

This response also shows you have no issues with meeting with the person but would prefer to do so in another location other than his or her house for now.

12. “Yes I can come over, but just so you know, I’m not ready for anything yet”

There are a million reasons why someone would want you to come over. Why not ask you on a coffee date? Why not movie dates?

It could mean they want to share moments and conversations with you that can’t be done publicly. It is a good thing to be straightforward with your intentions and position from the onset.

The above is a good response to give when someone asks you to visit them and you suspect they are nursing ulterior motives. By accepting the invitation this way, you are setting the boundaries right off the bat.

13. “No problem as long as you don’t have any expectations”

As a sequel to the aforementioned response, you can also reply to a visit request by letting them know there is nothing more to the visit. When you give this response, you are maintaining your position right away.

It means that even though you accept to meet with them at their house, it doesn’t send the green light that you are into them. It means that the visit should be kept as casual as possible.

14. “That sounds like a great idea! I’ll check my budget and see if I can swing it.”

Visiting someone comes with a little responsibility, whether you like it or not. You can be nice enough to get a drink or meal on your way to their house.

It could also imply that you need to assist in making a memorable one at their location. Traveling to the person’s house will also cost you time (if not only money)

So, while you like the idea of visiting the person, this response allows you to check if you can afford it.

15. “I’ll have to check with my family (friends or partner), but I hope I can make it.”

Ways to Respond to Come Visit Me

Lastly, this is a sound reply to give when someone asks you to visit them, but you need to check with someone else before you can commit to visiting.

It is a response I give when people put me on the spot and make this request, so what is stopping you from using it too?

Before You Go…

Now that you’ve armed yourself with enough responses for when the next someone invites you over (to fit any context), remember that the ultimate decision whether to accept or decline is in your hands.

You shouldn’t feel obligated to accept, especially when you suspect the intention behind the invitation or the person in question.

Not every could-you-come-over is a red flag. There is nothing wrong in expressing your excitement and you can express that by asking for more information to plan your trip to his/her place by saying something like” I can’t wait to come to visit! Can you send me the details so I can start planning my trip?”

In the same way, there is nothing wrong in politely expressing your disinterest. A response like “I’m not sure about a visit, but let’s talk about it more and figure something out” is a good thing to say if you are unsure about visiting but open to discussing it.

  • How to Respond When Someone Calls You Dear
  • 30 Comebacks When Someone Calls You Mean

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FutureofWorking.com

100 Best “Thank You for Visiting” Messages and Quotes

Here is a list of the 100 best “Thank You for Visiting” messages and quotes to let them know how nice it was to see them.

#1 It meant so much that you took the time to travel such a long way to see me. My days are always better when I get to be with you. Thank you so much for paying me a visit. I had such a wonderful time and will remember it for the rest of my years. I hope we can visit each other again soon.

#2 When a friend like you comes to see me, it makes an undeniable imprint in my life. Thank you for that gift, my friend. Not only did you change my day, but you gave me lasting happiness that I can carry with me as I remember the time we shared.

#3 Thank you sincerely for your kind visit. It meant a lot to me that you took the time to come by. I know how busy you are, and I truly value the time we spent together. Please know that I am very grateful for your kindness.

#4 Your visit was just what we needed. Great friends, great conversation, and great food. You made it very memorable and we thoroughly enjoyed reconnecting with you. Thank you so much for coming.

#5 I’m already excited about the next time you visit! Thank you so much for coming into town and making it seem so much brighter and better. Your energy and worldview never cease to inspire me, and I’m so happy we found the time to see each other. Thank you for coming!

#6 I know how much effort it took to get here! I hope you know just how loved you are and how much you can make my year better just by coming by. Thank you, my friend, for coming to visit.

#7 What an excellent visit we had with you, hearing about all your exciting new plans! We are thrilled you made time to come and share them with us. Even though we don’t get to see each other face-to-face very often, you’re always in our hearts. It was fantastic to see you in the flesh!

#8 As the years go by, we have come to realize how much our loved ones mean to us. You are a loved and dear friend, and it was especially kind of you to stop by and visit recently. I hope you enjoyed your time as much as I did. I treasure our friendship immensely. Thank you for paying me a visit.

#9 Thank you so much for putting in the time to come see me. I cherish our visits no matter how long or short. Let’s please do this again. I miss you already.

#10 The worst part about you visiting is when you have to say goodbye! I had such a meaningful time with you and will think fondly of the new memories we created and the old ones we shared. Thank you so much for visiting!

#11 Thank you for coming to see me! I can’t stop thinking about all the laughs we had. I will tell stories of our time together for years to come. Let’s do it again soon!

#12 When our loved ones are near, it warms our hearts and reminds us of how blessed we truly are. Thank you for coming to visit me. It was so very good to see you.

#13 Near or far, I know that a friend like you will always be a blessing in my life. Thank you so much for coming to visit me. You were such a good, gracious guest and I only hope I did right by you as a host. Please feel free to come again anytime.

#14 What a joy it is whenever you are around! Thank you for stopping by and visiting. Let’s do it again soon. I miss you so much when you aren’t around.

#15 Friendship is more precious than gold. No matter where we are in life, it means the world that we have the connection that we do. Thank you for visiting. Let’s never be strangers.

#16 The love of family can cross any distance, and it’s so wonderful to be reminded of that. It was lovely to see you and catch up with you again. You are more than welcome to visit again whenever you can. Thank you so much for coming.

#17 Wishing you a safe journey back. It was just delightful to see you on your recent visit. We loved renewing our friendship and appreciated the effort you made to come. Thank you so much for visiting. It always means so much to see you.

#18 It was truly a treat to see you, and I sure hope we can do it again soon. Thank you so much for coming to stay for a while.

#19 Thank you for your visit. Each moment was a pure delight, and I’m looking forward to the next time we see each other. Thank you so much!

#20 Although time and distance all too often gets in the way, whenever we reconnect, we pick up where we left off. That’s friendship. Thank you so much for going out of your way to see me. I am so touched. Thank you for visiting.

#21 Thank you, thank you, thank you for visiting! Seeing your face brightened up my day. I hope to see you again soon. I miss you so much when you aren’t around!

#22 Your visit was like a balm to my soul. Thank you for coming by and bringing so much comfort, joy, and laughter. I will treasure those moments together.

#23 Although we may not see each other as often as we’d like, distance is no match for the bond that we share. Thank you for coming to visit. It was fantastic to catch up.

#24 Thanks so much for visiting! It always cheers us up to see you. We wish you safe travels on your journey back home. Please call or text us to let us know you arrived safely!

#25 We always have so much fun when you’re here. Thank you for visiting and brightening up our home with your beautiful spirit. Let’s do it again soon!

#26 Although life has taken us in different directions, whenever we’re together, I’m reminded of how much we have in common, and how much we both care. Thank you for visiting. We have a beautiful time with you.

#27 Your visit meant the world, and this is just a little note to say thank you for coming to stay awhile. Seeing you always makes my day better!

#28 I was looking forward to your visit for so long, and it did not disappoint! Thank you for taking the time to come see me. Your presence really brightened up my week!

#29 Wishing you very safe travels back home. It was so nice catching up. You’re such an entertaining guest and I miss you so much already. You made my week so much brighter. Thank you for stopping by!

#30 This is a little note to say thank you for coming to visit. Getting to see you was such a surprise and a very special treat! I hope we can do it again soon.

#31 God has truly blessed me with a friend like you. Thank you for coming such a long way and staying to visit. We will treasure the time we had together.

#32 Your recent visit meant so much.  We are grateful for the time you spent here in our home and the encouragement it was to us. Wishing you all the best, now and always.

#33 Each visit you make means the whole world to me. I’m so happy I got to see you. I love you and I hope you’re doing well.

#34 When times are tough, it brings great comfort to be in the presence of the ones I care about. Thank you so much for visiting. You are such a comfort.

#35 This is just a little note to say thank you for your visit! It was an honor to be able to host you on your recent visit. We hope that you enjoyed your time with us and felt very welcome. Thank you so much for your visit.

#36 Your visits are always such a gift. I couldn’t ask for a more wonderful friend. Thank you so much for coming to stay.

#37 Your visit made me jump for joy! I loved that we were able to spend quality time together and enjoy the many memories we share. Come back soon!

#38 How fantastic it was to see you recently! We cannot thank you enough for coming to visit us. Your friendship means such a lot to us. We had a great time!

#39 What fun we had together on your recent visit. I wish we could get together more often! Please know that you are welcome any time you are able to come.

#40 Thank you for your visit! I haven’t laughed so hard since the last time I saw you. You mean so much to me and it was so good to catch up. Thank you for coming!

#41 Your visit was a real highlight for us and we had such a fun time with you. We really hope you can make it back here again in the not too distant future. Thank you so much for visiting!

#42 What a fun time we had together on your visit. Thank you so much for spending that precious time with us. We appreciated it greatly.

#43 I know you have a packed schedule and I truly appreciate you could find time to visit us. Thank you!

#44 Thank you for visiting…it was so much fun! Getting to talk like that meant so much to me. I would love to see you again soon. Stay well, my friend.

#45 My [broken leg] hurts less and the hospital doesn’t seem so dull and dreary after your visit. Thank you!

#46 My wife and I would like to express our gratitude to you for visiting us [last week]. We enjoyed spending [the evening] with you. Let’s do it again soon!

#47 Time flew by with our fantastic conversation about [politics and life]. Thanks for visiting! It was just the break we needed.

#48 My door is always open for you. Thank you so much for visiting me. It means so much to me to know you took time out of your busy life to come to see me.

#49 Your visits always make my life better. Thank you so much for coming to see me. I hope you had as good of a time as I did!

#50 I am writing this note while enjoying the [delicious cookies] you brought me. Thanks for the lovely visit. Please come back soon!

#51 Thank you for finding the time and making a visit. We’ve missed you so much! We all had a great time with you. Thank you, my friend, for coming to visit.

#52 What can be better than celebrating [your birthday] with your best friend? Thank you for coming and thanks for the thoughtful gift!

#53 It was a real joy to see you recently. Your visit meant so much more than you can imagine. Thank you for going out of your way to spend time with us.

#54 I want to thank you for being so gracious and coming to visit us at our new place. I hope you’ll come again soon. Seeing you always makes the day better!

#55 Thank you for coming to visit us with your beautiful family. I am so happy our kids finally got to meet each other. My daughter is already missing her new friend!

#56 It’s been a while since we had a delightful evening with such good conversation. Thanks for the company. It was truly wonderful.

#57 Having to spend summer days at a hospital is no fun. Thank you for being such a caring friend and coming to see me so often. Your visits are a great comfort to me and I will never forget your kindness.

#58 I am thrilled to let you know that my health is improving, and I will be discharged from the hospital in a few days. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for coming to see me. Thank you for being there for me when I needed it most.

#59 Thank you again for coming to visit me. It was so good to catch up and remember our good old times. Let’s do it again!

#60 Thank you for coming to stay! We really loved having our truly special friend share our home with us. We already miss you!

#61 Thank you for making the trip to be with us at our [son’s first birthday]. Your visit made our celebration even more special!

#62 Seeing you is always a gift. I wanted to say thank you for taking the time to stop by and share your time with us. It meant so much to us.

#63 There are no words to express our gratitude to you for the kindness and support you showed us in these difficult times. Thank you for visiting and sharing our grief. God bless you.

#64 It’s only been [two] days since you left but we already miss you. Thank you for coming and spending your holidays with us!

The Most Famous Quotes to Include with Your Thank You Message for the Visit

“Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.” Anais Nin

“There’s only one thing more precious than our time and that’s who we spend it on.” Leo Christopher

“Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend.” Theophrastus

“The way we spend our time defines who we are.” Jonathan Estrin

“Time well spent adds to life well lived.” Martin Ugwu

“Friends are the family you choose.” Jess C. Scott

“You can always tell a real friend: when you’ve made a fool of yourself he doesn’t feel you’ve done a permanent job.” Laurence J. Peter

“A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees.” Amelia Earhart

“Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.” Eleanor Roosevelt

“Gratitude is the inward feeling of kindness received. Thankfulness is the natural impulse to express that feeling. Thanksgiving is the following of that impulse.” Henry Van Dyke

“Words may show a man’s wit, but actions his meaning.” Benjamin Franklin

“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” Mark Twain

“Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” Marcel Proust

“To the world you may be just one person, but to one person you may be the world.” Brandi Snyder

“I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar.” Robert Brault

“Kindness is a passport that opens doors and fashions friends. It softens hearts and molds relationships that can last lifetimes.” Joseph B. Wirthlin

“Time is more value than money. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time.” Jim Rohn

“Rare as is true love, true friendship is rarer.” Jean de la Fontaine

“A little thought and a little kindness are often worth more than a great deal of money.” John Ruskin

“The friend that always finds time to spend with you without consulting his or her calendar is a true friend.” Ellen J. Barrier

“Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer.” Ed Cunningham

“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art…It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.” C.S. Lewis

“Unexpected kindness is the most powerful, least costly, and most underrated agent of human change.” Bob Kerrey

“True friends are always together in spirit.” L.M. Montgomery

“Friendship is the only cement that will ever hold the world together.” Woodrow T. Wilson

“Friendship improves happiness, and abates misery, by doubling our joys, and dividing our grief.” Cicero

“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” Walter Winchell

“Friendship is the golden thread that ties the heart of all the world.” John Evelyn

“A good friend is like a four-leaf clover: hard to find and lucky to have.” Irish Proverb

“One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives.” Euripides

“Words are from the lips, actions are from the heart.” Rashida Costa

“A friend is one of the nicest things you can have, and one of the best things you can be.” Douglas Pagels

“There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate.” Linda Grayson

“Kindness begins with the understanding that we all struggle.” Charles Glassman

“I would rather walk with a friend in the dark, than alone in the light.” Helen Keller

“Time is free, but it’s priceless. You can’t own it, but you can use it. You can’t keep it, but you can spend it. Once you’ve lost it you can never get it back.” Harvey Mackay

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"Thank You for Visiting" Messages

Luke 11:5-13 New King James Version

A friend comes at midnight.

5  And He said to them, “Which of you shall have a friend, and go to him at midnight and say to him, ‘Friend, lend me three loaves; 6  for a friend of mine has come to me on his journey, and I have nothing to set before him’; 7  and he will answer from within and say, ‘Do not trouble me; the door is now shut, and my children are with me in bed; I cannot rise and give to you’? 8  I say to you, ( A ) though he will not rise and give to him because he is his friend, yet because of his persistence he will rise and give him as many as he needs.

Keep Asking, Seeking, Knocking ( B )

9  ( C ) “So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; ( D ) seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. 10  For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. 11  ( E ) If a son asks for [ a ] bread from any father among you, will he give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent instead of a fish? 12  Or if he asks for an egg, will he offer him a scorpion? 13  If you then, being evil, know how to give ( F ) good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!”

  • Luke 11:11 NU omits bread from any father among you, will he give him a stone? Or if he asks for

Cross references

  • Luke 11:8 : [Luke 18:1–5]
  • Luke 11:9 : Matt. 7:7–11
  • Luke 11:9 : Ps. 50:14, 15; Jer. 33:3; [Matt. 7:7; 21:22; Mark 11:24; John 15:7; James 1:5, 6; 1 John 3:22; 5:14, 15]
  • Luke 11:9 : Is. 55:6
  • Luke 11:11 : Matt. 7:9
  • Luke 11:13 : James 1:17

Scripture taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

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Relationships

17 Sneaky Signs Someone Doesn't Want To Hang Out

#1: They always bring a third wheel.

These are the signs your friend doesn't want to hang out with you anymore — and what you can do to a...

Ever send out a few texts to see if someone would be down to get together, but then they don’t respond and you think, “Wow, no one wants to hang out with me”? That’s as good a moment as any to assess your connections and consider if your friends are just busy, or if they’re brushing you off for another reason.

If someone’s lack of response has become a trend, it could be a sign your friendship is drifting apart . “That happens when you’ve grown in different directions, no longer have much in common, or have schedules that are no longer in sync,” psychologist and friendship expert Irene S. Levine, Ph.D., tells Bustle. There also may be underlying hurt feelings that need to be discussed. You won’t know why your friend doesn’t want to hang out — or if it’s a temporary or permanent situation — unless you talk about it.

Of course, it’s also possible someone’s lack of desire to hang out has nothing to do with you or your vibe and everything to do with them. "A lot of people know themselves and how many friends they can keep up with," says therapist Rebecca Rawczak, LICSW . If a newer acquaintance always cancels plans last minute, this may be what’s going on.

As psychotherapist Dorlee Michaeli, LCSW tells Bustle, you’ll know you’ve met a real pal when they’re supportive, they listen, and they’re equally invested in getting together. There’s no use forcing companionship, especially with someone who doesn’t invite you out, doesn’t text back, or otherwise treats you wrong. If anything on the list below rings a bell, it may be time to adjust your expectations, focus on yourself, and consider what you’re willing to accept in a friendship.

1. They Always Bring A Third Wheel

Consider why your friend always brings someone else along whenever you hang out.

If you were expecting a friend to show up solo, it can come as quite the shock when they roll in with a mystery third person. Of course, they may just want you two to meet. But if they keep bringing unexpected guests without asking, Levine says it could be a sign they’re trying to “dilute the relationship.” In other words, they may no longer be invested in the friendship.

If this keeps happening, the best thing to do is be honest about how you feel. It might spark a much-needed convo about why your friend never wants to hang out with just you.

2. You're The One Making All The Plans

Take note if you’re the only one who reaches out to make plans, as Levine says it could be a sign you aren’t hanging out with “ your people .” It’s important to keep in mind that folks get busy and go through phases in life, so it isn’t a big deal if a few Saturdays go by and they don’t ask to meet up. If it feels like no one reaches out on the regular, though, consider it a sign that this particular friend group may not be right for you .

3. They Send Your Calls To Voicemail

Not everyone is a big “phone person,” but consider it another sign if your friend almost always ignores your calls, says relationship expert Dr. Brenda Wade . “People can change over time, including friends,” she tells Bustle. “An old friend may no longer want what you want .” And that may mean they no longer care to invest time and energy, even enough to pick up the phone.

The best way to handle it? Match their energy and reach out less often to see if that makes a difference. “You have the ability to shift the friendship from hot to warm,” Wade says. See if it feels better if you only talk on occasion. Who knows? The friendship might rekindle once you give it a little breathing room.

4. You Can't Nail Down A Date

A friend who doesn't want to hang out will be wish-washy about plans.

This one is confusing because it often involves a friend who acts like they want to hang out, but never actually does. This is the person who suggests coffee dates and movie nights, but then doesn’t follow through by making solid plans. If this habit continues, it’s another chance to give them space. "Back off and let your friend initiate," Levine says. "Sometimes, even very good friends need a break from one another ."

5. They Give Vague Excuses When Canceling

Consider how your friend goes about canceling plans. Do they have a legit reason? Or is it always one vague excuse after another ? "Once or twice may be a coincidence if they give you a strong reason for canceling, like they have another friend visiting from out of town," says Rawczak. "But if they repeatedly give you vague reasons like, 'I’m busy' or 'I already have plans,' then they are either a) a covert operative for an international spy agency, or b) not interested enough in hanging out to make time for it."

6. They Seem Checked Out

Let’s say you do get together, but it’s been 20 minutes and your friend has yet to look up from their phone . Sure, they may be busy responding to something dire, but it's also possible they aren’t fully interested in the get-together.

According to Levine, some friends will act like this when they’re feeling burnt-out, either from life or the friendship. Friendship burnout can happen when one person relies too heavily on the other to fulfill all their needs . It also might mean they aren’t interested in maintaining a connection, at which point you can bid them adieu.

7. All Your Convos Fall Flat

If your conversations always fall flat, it may be because your friend doesn't want to hang out.

Since not everyone’s super chatty, it’s totally cool if you’re more into quiet hangouts. But if your conversational friend suddenly doesn’t want to talk, it really may be a reflection of your relationship. Levine says convos typically fall flat when one person is only hanging out as a favor, and not because they’re truly invested. It sucks to think of it this way, but it may help explain what’s going on. Talking about it with your friend is the best solution. If you both agree it's not worth the effort , it can save you both a lot of heartache and a lot of wasted time.

8. You Didn’t Get An Invite

While it’s possible they were bad at organizing and left a few people out accidentally, take it as a sign if your friends get together for a party and don’t ask you to join. "A lot of people use parties to start to deepen relationships,” Rawczak says. It’s tough not to take it personally, but know that you’ll be much happier with a friend or friend group who doesn’t leave you out.

If this happens to you with someone you were close with, try turning the tables. Throw your own party and invite a bunch of people. "You may be surprised who shows up, and that’s a strong indication they are interested in knowing you better outside of your shared hobbies,” says Rawczak.

9. They Make Rude Remarks

Does it feel like this person is being rude for no reason? Michaeli says it might be their (conscious or unconscious) way of driving a wedge between you, possibly to put you off from trying to hang out again.

In any case, it isn’t something you’ll want to stick around for. “Rudeness is a type of emotional abuse that’ll slowly chip away at your sense of self,” she says. “The cumulative effect of belittling can be long-lasting and difficult to heal.”

10. Their Needs Are Always The Priority

Do your friend's needs always come first?

Are your needs never met in your friendship? “Coming in second place with your friend is another red flag things are off,” Michaeli says. “While there may be times when you need to give more to your friend, you shouldn’t always have to put your needs aside for them.” It’s a clear sign this person doesn’t truly want to hang out and/or invest in a relationship since true hangouts are mutually fulfilling.

11. They Take Forever To Text Back

If your friend isn’t feeling it, you may be constantly left on read. “They may not answer texts , calls, or any form of communication,” therapist Stephanie Moir, LMHC tells Bustle. “Some people may even go as far as to block you on social media.” This is a more blatant sign and one that should prompt you to invest energy in others.

12. You’ve Started Holding Back

Look for changes in yourself as well, like the fact you no longer reach out to this person with stories or life updates, or if you don’t tell them too much about what’s going on in your sphere anymore. It’s likely you’ve sensed that they won’t reciprocate, says Michaeli. So why bother?

13. Lots Of Time Passes Between Convos

A long time between texts may be a sign your friend doesn't want to hang out anymore.

You might have the type of friendship where you can go weeks, months, or even years without talking much, and then pick right back up where you left off. If this person isn’t too keen on hanging out, though, you’ll notice that your conversations grow further apart — and when they do happen, the convos aren’t vibrant or fun. “It could be that they don’t want to tell you about what they have been up to anymore,” says psychotherapist Shagoon Maurya, MA .

14. They’re Active On Social Media... But Don’t Text Back

Another reason someone might seem MIA is if their life is super busy, they’re going through a tough time, or are overwhelmed. But take note if you see them splashed across social media, Maurya says. If they’re active everywhere else, but can’t seem to respond to you or hang out, it’s a clear sign they just aren’t that interested.

15. They Don’t Ask Questions

While this can also be a sign of a selfish friend , someone who is purposefully trying to create distance won’t ask questions when you talk. “Even when you manage to talk to them or meet them, they are uninterested in the conversation or aren’t as expressive,” Maurya says. They won’t want to hear about your life or ask what you’ve been up to.

16. Their Messages Are Super Short

If someone's texts are always super short, it may be a sign they aren't invested in your friendship.

You might even be able to tell your friend doesn’t want to hang out anymore based on how they text, says psychologist Danielle Selvin Harris, Psy.D . Are their replies super boring? Do they give one-word answers? “Not keeping a conversation going anymore is another passive way of trying to end a friendship by closing off communication,” she tells Bustle. “They may just hope you get the hint and stop trying to talk to them.”

17. You Feel Drained

Don’t be surprised if you feel drained — from thinking about this friendship, from feeling rejected, or from wondering why they don’t want to hang out, says therapist Meredith Waller, LCSW . No friendship is easy, she notes, but the ones that are worth it will leave you feeling energized most of the time.

The best thing to do if you notice these signs? After talking to your friend, giving them space, and considering what you’re looking for, you may want to cut your losses. “It is important to honor our self-worth by only allowing people into your life that add to it,” says Waller. And that includes folks who won’t leave you sitting home alone .

Irene S. Levine, Ph.D. , friendship expert

Rebecca Rawczak, LICSW , therapist

Dorlee Michaeli, MBA, LCSW , psychotherapist

Dr. Brenda Wade , relationship expert

Stephanie Moir, MA, CRC, LMHC , therapist

Shagoon Maurya, MA

Danielle Selvin Harris, PsyD, LMFT , psychologist

Meredith Waller, MSW, LCSW , therapist

This article was originally published on Oct. 28, 2016

friend came to visit me

  • Condolences & What To Say

35 Better Ways to Say ‘Thank You For Visiting Me’

Updated 08/1/2022

Published 09/4/2020

Joe Oliveto, BA in English

Joe Oliveto, BA in English

Contributing writer

Let someone know how much you appreciated seeing them with one of these 'thank you for visiting' messages.

Cake values integrity and transparency. We follow a strict editorial process to provide you with the best content possible. We also may earn commission from purchases made through affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. Learn more in our affiliate disclosure .

The company of friends and family is one of life’s greatest joys. It can also help us cope with life’s sorrows.

Jump ahead to these sections:

How to thank faraway guests for visiting you, how to thank someone for visiting while you were sick, how to thank a close friend for visiting you at home, how to thank someone for visiting you during difficult times, how to thank someone for visiting you in the hospital, how to thank someone for visiting your store or business, how to thank someone for visiting your church or place of worship.

That said, we don’t always get to see the important people in our lives as often as we might like. Maybe they live far away. Maybe you have busy lifestyles. Maybe both.

Thus, when people do visit us, we want to make sure we say “Thank you for visiting” in a way that genuinely conveys our appreciation. If you feel like a simple “thank you” isn’t enough, there are plenty of other ways to let someone know you’re thrilled they came to see you.

The following are just a few examples. Keep them in mind the next time you want someone to understand just how much you appreciated seeing them.

How to thank guests who live far away

When someone visits from far away, saying “Thank you for visiting” is particularly important. Consider doing so in one of the following ways.

1. Show them around

People visiting from far away may not be very familiar with your area.

Help them get the most out of their trip (and show your gratitude in the process) by taking them out to meals, showing them interesting local spots, and paying for them to enjoy activities unique to your area.

2. Cover their travel expenses

This might not be an option for everyone’s budget, but you could easily let guests know you appreciate them visiting by covering the travel expenses for at least one half of their trip.

3. Help with the packing

If you can’t afford to cover travel expenses for friends or family who traveled a long distance to see you, you can still address other practical concerns.

For example, if they traveled from far away, there’s a good chance they’ll have a lot of packing to do when they prepare to go back home. Make their last few days with you less stressful by helping them pack.

4. Make arrangements to visit them

We appreciate it when people travel from far away to see us because it indicates they care enough about us to spend a decent amount of precious time and money on a visit.

Show them you feel the same way by quickly making genuine arrangements to visit them sometime in the future.

5. Write a long letter 

This may seem like a simple gesture, but it involves more than writing a short thank you note .

Show guests who visited from far away your gratitude by sending them a long letter describing all the fun experiences you enjoyed because they made the trip.

A visit from a friend or loved one can make a big difference when you’re sick. Use one of these ideas to show your gratitude for these visits.

6. Send them a ‘Doctor Certification’ 

This is a cute way to say “Thank you for visiting” to someone who was there when you were sick if you both have a light-hearted sense of humor.

With your computer, you could create a fake doctor’s “certification” or diploma for someone who visited you. Include wording describing them as the best “unofficial doctor” (or something similar) and send it as a thank you gift.

7. Insist on helping

Odds are good you’ll have opportunities in the future to help out someone who visited you while you were sick. Examples can include cooking dinner for them when they’re busy, watching their kids, helping them move, and much more.

Make a list of ways you can help such a person, and insist on doing so until they accept your offer. Just don’t accept any payment for your help!

8. Send pictures of your progress

As you recover from an illness or injury, send pictures to your visitors demonstrating your progress, and let them know you sincerely believe you’ve recovered more quickly than you otherwise would’ve thanks to their company.

9. Thank them publicly

One of the best ways to say “Thank you for visiting” to someone who visited you while you were ill is simple: thank them.

However, instead of thanking them privately, write a public thank you post on social media. Letting your social media followers know just how much you appreciated the visits can turn a simple thank you into something much more special. 

10. Take them out 

One of the most common ways to show gratitude to someone who visits when you’re sick (particularly if they helped around the house during their visit) is to offer to pay them for their help.

The problem is, people usually won’t accept such offers. Instead, you can compensate them by taking them out to dinner or any other activity/experience you know they’ll enjoy.

How to Thank a Close Friend For Visiting You at Home

Simple visits from friends can yield plenty of happy memories. These ideas will help you thank a friend for making those memories possible.

11. Document the occasion 

Make sure a friend knows you appreciated their visit by taking pictures and/or video throughout their stay, and sending the pictures and videos to them after they return home.

12. Prepare their favorite food and drink

Let a friend visiting your home know you’re grateful by having some of their favorite foods and beverages readily available as soon as they arrive. It’s a small gesture that nevertheless shows genuine thoughtfulness.

13. Give a gift

It’s not uncommon to thank guests on special occasions (such as weddings) by giving them thank you gifts.

Show a friend you consider their visit to be special by sending them back home with the type of gift you would normally reserve for such occasions.

14. Gush about it on social media

Similar to publicly thanking someone who visited when you were sick on social media, posting pictures and videos of your friend’s visit on social media and describing how you had a great time will let them know you’re glad they stopped by.

15. Make future plans 

Friends want to feel welcome in your home when they visit. Prove to them they certainly are by making concrete plans for another visit in the near future before they leave.

Doing so will indicate you appreciated their visit so much you can’t wait for the next one.

Knowing how to thank someone for visiting during a difficult time can feel at least as tough as knowing how to ask for help in the first place, Luckily, it doesn’t have to.

16. Call (randomly) 

A thank you is often most effective when it’s a surprise. For example, you could make someone’s day by randomly calling them, asking if they have time to chat, and explaining to them how much their visit helped you cope with a painful situation.

If they’re the type to visit during difficult times, they’ll probably be willing to set aside a few minutes to listen to your gratitude—and they’ll appreciate it!

17. Do something fun

Visiting someone struggling with difficult life circumstances is emotionally draining.

When you’re doing better, pay someone back for making such a visit by planning a fun experience for the two of you to enjoy.

18. “I know you were also going through…”

No one’s life is completely free of difficulties. It’s highly likely someone who visited you during a hard time was also struggling with some of their own challenges, even if they were as seemingly minor as a tense relationship with a coworker.

Regardless of the specific way you say thank you to someone, let them know you understand they were also going through their own difficulties (be sure to name the specific difficulties, too), and you appreciate how they set those aside to care for you.

19. Set a goal (and achieve it)

When a friend or family member visits you during a painful time, they want to believe their visit will help you overcome your challenges in the long run. Thus, you might set a goal together during their visit. Achieving a major personal goal is often a sign you’ve recovered from difficult circumstances.

Most importantly, make every attempt to genuinely achieve this goal, and let the person who helped you set the goal know you couldn’t have done it without them once you do achieve it.

20. Send a book of thank you quotes 

Some people struggle to say “Thank you for visiting during difficult times” because they’re simply not great with words. Not all of us are poets, after all.

Don’t worry if you feel this way about yourself. You could still show gratitude by sending someone a book of famous thank you quotes , highlighting those you think best convey your feelings.

How to Thank Someone For Visiting You in the Hospital

An extended stay in a hospital is often an unpleasant experience regardless of your reason for hospitalization. Visits from friends and family can make this experience much easier than it might otherwise be. Thank those who stopped by while you were in the hospital in one of the following ways:

21. Help with errands or household tasks

Someone who visited you in the hospital may have had to rearrange their daily schedule to do so. Thank them for traveling to see you despite having to inconvenience themselves to make the trip by helping out with certain essential tasks they may have fallen behind on.

22. Update them on your progress

A person who visits you in the hospital likely does so at least in part because they want to know you are recovering from an illness or injury. Thus, when you’re out of the hospital, you could express your appreciation by regularly updating them on your recovery. Be sure to thank them for visiting you every time you send these updates!

23. Grab a gift from the hospital gift shop

Many hospitals have gift shops. Although many of the items they sell are the type of gifts someone might buy for a patient at the hospital, they may also offer certain general items (such as flowers) that you could pick up as a gift for someone who visited you as you’re leaving the hospital.

24. Pay for their gas

This is a lot more practical and a lot less sentimental than many of the other items on this list, but nevertheless, it might be the proper way to thank someone who visited you in the hospital if they had to drive a relatively long way to get there. Simply paying for their gas is a means of acknowledging that you know they chose to go out of their way to offer you some comfort when you needed it.

25. Remember to visit them

There may come a day when someone who visited you in the hospital falls ill, is hospitalized, or otherwise finds themself in a similar position to the one in which you were in during your hospital stay. Remember how much it meant when they stopped by to check on you, and return the favor by visiting them in their time of need. 

This might not be a way to thank someone for visiting you in the hospital immediately after you return home, but it’s nevertheless a meaningful way to express your appreciation if you ever get this opportunity.

Starting a business is both an exciting and intimidating experience. A simple visit from a friend, family member, or loyal customer can help you maintain your enthusiasm instead of worrying about your business’ future, particularly during the critical early stages of growth. Thank someone for this type of gesture in one of the following ways:

26. Offer a discount

You don’t necessarily want to cultivate a reputation for being the type of business owner who consistently reserves “special treatment” for family members and friends while not offering the same treatment to other customers. 

However, if someone you know supports your business shortly after you open your doors, it’s perfectly acceptable to thank them by offering discounts, coupons for future purchases, or even free items (as long as they know they shouldn’t expect this to be a regular policy).

27. Visit their store or business

Does the person who visited your store or business have their own business as well? If so, support them in return by visiting their business or making a purchase if they only operate online. You could also refer your own customers to their business to help it grow and thrive.

28. Acknowledge them on social media

Regardless of their industries, in the digital age, most successful businesses have social media presences. You can use your social media pages to publicly thank early customers who have visited your business.

29. Name an item or special after them

True, this isn’t a method that will work for all business owners, but if your new business is a restaurant, cafe, or similar type of establishment, you might consider expressing your appreciation for an early supporter by naming a menu item after them. Just make sure you get their permission before doing so!

30. Offer them a job

This is another way to thank someone for visiting your business that likely won’t apply in all situations. That said, if someone you know is looking for work and supports your business despite having money troubles of their own, if you can justify doing so without harming your business’ finances, consider offering them a job.

31. Invite them to business events

If you’re a small business owner who arranges parties and other such events for your employees, there may be instances when it’s also appropriate to invite non-employees who regularly visit your business to these events. Doing so is a way of showing gratitude that can result in even greater customer loyalty.

How to Thank Someone For Visiting Your Church

There are many reasons you may want to thank someone for visiting your place of worship when they otherwise might not have felt inclined to. Thank someone for joining you at your church or other such religious institution in the following ways:

32. Thank them for researching your customs and traditions

Whether someone has visited your place of worship for a wedding, funeral, initiation rite (such as a bar mitzvah or First Communion), or any similar event, if you notice they clearly did their homework to ensure they were respectful of your religion throughout the ceremony, let them know you appreciate the effort they put in. 

You can verbally express your thanks, mention this detail in a letter, or even merely send a text message thanking them for going the extra mile.

33. Thank them for being open to embracing your religion

Again, the potential reasons why someone might visit your place of worship with you are numerous and varied. For example, someone might agree to attend a religious ceremony with you because you are encouraging them to convert and you want them to at least expose themselves to your religion before dismissing the idea entirely.

After the visit, they might decide that converting is not something they wish to do. Even if this happens, you should still thank them for making an honest attempt to experience your religion in such an important setting.

34. Thank them in a speech

Once more, a common reason to visit someone’s place of worship when you are not a member of the same religious community is to attend a wedding or other religious event. Those organizing these events often deliver speeches during or after them. 

If you’re giving such a speech, take the opportunity to thank all those in attendance who participated in your religious traditions even though they might not have been familiar with them.

35. Acknowledge that the experience may have made them uncomfortable

You might be thanking someone for visiting your church or place of worship because you know that they don’t share your religious beliefs, but nevertheless agreed to accompany you because they knew that doing so was important to you.

For example, maybe your family is religious, and a new romantic partner has visited your place of worship despite not being a member of your religious community because they understand the value of making the right impression on your loved ones. In such instances, a thank you can be particularly meaningful if it acknowledges that someone put themselves in an uncomfortable position for you.

‘Thank You For Visiting’: Celebrating Friends and Family

Regardless of your life circumstances, visits from the important people in your life can bring tremendous happiness. These ideas will help you show your gratitude.

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Seek Ye First: Interview with Karen Lafferty

  • Harry Boonstra

Even if you don't know very many Scripture choruses or praise songs, there's a good chance you'll know "Seek Ye First the Kingdom of God." From the time it was written in 1972, the song has been a "hit" and has been incorporated into countless hymnals and albums. To its composer, Karen Lafferty, "Seek Ye First" has been a wonderful miracle which gives her daily joy.

In a dusty office in Amsterdam, Karen and I reminisced about the song and its impact. The Musicians for Missions group that Karen is currently involved with has bought an old "Seaman's Home" on one of the canals in Amsterdam, and they are busy remodeling the building into office, classroom, and recording space. We sip strong Dutch espresso coffee and talk about her life, her faith, her music, and her ministry.

Before we start talking about your music, tell us a bit about yourself.

I was raised in a Christian home, but like many young people I wanted to discover life for myself and did some drifting. I was working as a nightclub entertainer in New Orleans when a friend came to visit me and got me back on the right track. After that I began to write Christian songs.

Had you had much musical training?

I had a degree in music education from Eastern New Mexico University, which was really a degree in choral directing with a minor in oboe. After this turning in my life, I felt ready to begin serving in Christian music ministry. But when I applied for a position in that field, I got turned down. For a while I felt crushed by that closed door.

So, what did you do?

I decided to pursue entertainment for the time being—to try to be salt and light in the entertainment world. So I moved to California.

Because I was from a small town in New Mexico, and California was this weird and wild place, I did a lot of praying during that move: "God, if there are any Christians in California . . ." Of course, what I didn't know was that the whole Jesus Movement was really starting to grow at this time.

Soon I did find a church, Calvary Chapel, and at my first service I met a lot of other young musicians. I left the service that day crying with joy.

During my early days in California, I continued some of my entertainment jobs. In fact, some of the first people I led to the Lord I met in bars. But I still had a very strong desire to work full time for the Lord.

Calvary Chapel led you to your music ministry?

At this time "Maranatha! Music" was part of Calvary Chapel. It was very small yet and had produced only one album, An Everlasting Jesus Music Concert. At the chapel we had a special fellowship for musicians which taught us principles on how to serve through music. Most of us were especially interested in contemporary Christian music, music that would reach young people.

I stayed with Maranatha! Music for about eight years, working with them on various praise albums. I also did four of my own albums through them.

What brought you to Europe?

In 19731 was on a concert tour in Great Britain, Germany, and Holland with a group called "Children of the Day," and in 19781 visited Europe again on an extended tour. Thaf s when I really got the vision for Musicians for Missions.

I also conducted a discipleship training school in Europe in 1979-80 and began to sing regularly at contemporary Christian music concerts. Often I was the first person whom the audience had heard singing this type of Christian music. And I saw how effective it could be—even though I sang in English with a translation on an overhead.

When did you join Youth with a Mission?

In 1980, and out of that relationship came Musicians for Missions. Youth with a Mission is very involved with, the idea of cross-cultural missions. Even though we dealt with a subculture of young people who all liked the same kind of music, there were still many cultural differences. I felt I had to live outside of the U.S. to really learn what it is to be in another country. And under the umbrella of Youth with a Mission I was able to organize Musicians for Missions.

How do you spend your time now?

I'm spending too much time in administration, doing all kinds of arranging and scheduling. (We currently have twelve full-time musicians recording and doing tours). I feel that my strength is really in taking young musicians on the road and showing them by example what ministry is about. I hope to be able to spend more time doing that.

Let's back up for a minute. What was the origin of "Seek Ye First"?

It was back in 1971. I had quit my entertainment job and was trying to support myself with teaching guitar lessons. I had three students! When my savings were all gone and I had no money to make my car payments, I became very discouraged and confused.

One evening I went to a Bible study at church, and we talked about Matthew 6:33.1 was tremendously encouraged and challenged by the words about Christ's kingdom. So I went home, wrote the tune, recorded it on a tape recorder, and then sang this little descant part.

I taught the song at church the next week, and it caught on right away. The Lord really paved the way for me with that song. "Seek Ye First" has opened doors for me all over the world. And because it's in so many hymnbooks, about 40 percent of my mission support comes from that song!

Do you sing mostly your own songs now?

Not really. I do about 70 percent of my own songs. If I hear a song that really expresses what I want to say (but they've beaten me to it!), I'll choose that—especially now that I have so little time for song writing. I've just finished a new solo album— the first one in about eight years.

Are most of the songs you write Scripture songs?

No, they're not, although I put a lot of Scripture into my songs. My songs are usually about people and places and are written in language that people can relate to readily.

Have you written any "regular" hymns that folks back home in "First Church" might sing?

I've done a children's song that's been used on children's albums. But the few hymns that I have written are not well known. I write most of my songs for concerts.

Nothing you've done has become as well known as "Seek Ye First," has it?

No, and sometimes I say, "Lord, I need another hit!" Of course, I know how tempting it is to live only for the charts. And I believe that my goal must always be to do my best for the Lord, not just to be successful. If I have followed that goal and my song also happens to become a hit, thaf s wonderful!

Would you like to do more praise songs?

The praise-song tradition is wonderful, and I would like one of my next albums to be a praise album. I'd like it to be a combination of some pieces that are singable by anyone, with others that people might mostly listen to. Some of John Michael Talbof s albums are that way. You can worship in your heart with the songs, even though you might not sing along with all of them.

Some time ago Don Hustad wrote an article, criticizing the praise tradition for too much repetitious singing and not enough "content" Whaf s your reaction?

In music (as in many other areas), "we need it all." Once when I was going through a very heavy time, I sang parts of a song over and over: "I stand in the righteousness of Jesus, the Son." Those words were a source of tremendous comfort to me and helped me listen to the Spirit. So, there's a place for repetition. But there's also a need for content.

How do you deal with the issue of different musical tastes in the church?

I want to be a minister of the gospel and do it through music. So, I must be very sensitive to my audience, and I have to be careful that I do not cause offense. I do enjoy singing for all ages and for people with different musical interests.

If I'm asked to sing on a Sunday morning in a Lutheran church, thinking about my audience influences my whole presentation; from the way I dress to the songs I select, and sometimes the instrumentations I choose. I'll tend to begin with songs that are familiar to their tradition, and then I'll try to build bridges to songs they're less familiar with.

Sometimes I sing for young people from the streets of Amsterdam, and then I'll use songs that are much more pop-and-rock oriented.

Are there any musical styles that are taboo to the Christian?

That's a difficult question. I feel that instruments like electric guitars and drums and the rock tradition can be used very effectively in Christian music. But, because of associations with the drug culture, we have to have spiritual wisdom to use that medium.

One person who's handled that issue well is Glenn Kaiser, from a group called "Resurrection Band." Kaiser was a rocker, but after he was saved, he gave up rock music for two years. He later returned to rock as a means of reaching young people in their "language" with the good news. But he feels that the Lord "re-birthed" rock in him in a whole different way. If you go to a secular rock concert and then compare it to Resurrection Band, there really is a big difference.

Is this a question of how we can use our culture in our ministry?

Yes. I believe strongly in giving young people good alternatives in entertainment. Entertainment is sometimes a dirty word (you know—"I want to minister, not entertain"), but I think life should be entertaining. Life is supposed to be colorful. And we can give content and meaning to something that is entertaining.

Thay's the way I also approach a concert. I first do some light songs and get the audience relaxed and clapping. Remember, I'm from a cowboy culture, and I do some crazy and down-home stuff. I also think if s important to begin with the lighter material because I want to show young people that Christians are not just serious, heavy people.

But as the concert proceeds, I gradually start telling my own story and stories of other people. And I sing some very serious songs.

DISCOGRAPHY

Bird in a Golden Sky , 1974 (Maranatha! Music); Sweet Communion , 1976 (Maranatha! Music); Life Pages , 1978 (Maranatha! Music); Country to Country , 1982 (Ministry Resource Center); Land of No Goodbyes , 1989 (MFM Productions). All albums are available through Musicians for Missions; Kadijksplein 18; 1018 AC Amsterdam; The Netherlands.

Harry Boonstra ( [email protected] ) is former theological editor of RW and emeritus theological librarian of Calvin College and Calvin Theological Seminary, Grand Rapids, Michigan.

Ask Amy: I’m lonely after moving to a new town. Any suggestions on how to make friends?

  • Published: Mar. 24, 2024, 2:00 a.m.

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In today's Ask Amy column, Amy Dickinson responds to someone who is struggling to make friends in a new town. Dreamstime

  • Amy Dickinson

Dear Amy: I moved to a semi-rural area for a public-facing job.

One way I am trying to meet people is by hosting small dinner gatherings where I invite a group of people whom I think might make for interesting conversation. These people may or may not already know each other.

This almost never works out. I’ve had people ask if I will invite so-and-so. I’ve had people call me during dinner to say they would not be coming.

Once, I had an expectation of 11 people coming and ended up serving five.

Truth be told, in this new town and new position, I am lonely.

I want to get to know people better and this consistent weirdness (to me) has been frustrating and saddening.

Is this just how it goes in the country?

– Confused Host

Dear Confused: I shared your question with Richard L. Kyte Ph.D., director of the Ethics Institute at Viterbo University, whose new book, “Finding Your Third Place: Building Happier Communities (and Making Great Friends Along the Way)” comes out this spring (Fulcrum publishing).

He and I agree that instead of inviting strangers in , you should find a “third place” to go to .

Richard Kyte reminds us: “Dinner parties are great ways to connect people who are looking for ways to broaden their social circle, but they may not be the best way to start out trying to make friends in a place where most people’s social ties are already broad and deep.

“Try finding ways to meet people gradually through social gatherings that are already established in your community: coffee shops, taverns, places of worship, service organizations. Let people get to know you in settings where they are comfortable, instead of asking them to meet you on your turf.

This is why “third places” (which are neither home nor work) are so important for meeting people and making friends. They serve as neutral ground where people aren’t burdened by the obligations of guest or host.”

Check out prior Ask Amy columns

(You can email Amy Dickinson at [email protected] or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook .)

©2023 Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.

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People Are Sharing The Exact Moment They Knew Their Friendship Was Over With Their Best Friend

"She met me in the park and presented me with a Google Doc list of complaints about me."

Fabiana Buontempo

BuzzFeed Staff

Whether a friend has been in your life for a year or 30 years, it's always difficult to end a friendship, but sometimes it is necessary. Recently, members of the BuzzFeed Community shared their experiences with ending a friendship. Here is what some had to say:

Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity. 

1. "My best friend and I had been best friends since university. We met at a mutual friend's wedding and just bonded, became inseparable, hung out, and had fun. We were always there for each other during breakups and other major life milestones and events. When she needed a place to stay, my parents invited her to move in, and she did for months. After she moved out, my mom still cooked things she liked and sent them to her. But it was always about her, everything. It got to the point that I stopped sharing things about my life because even when I did, it always ended up being about her."

Two individuals are sitting on a couch, viewed from above, each holding a cup, engaged in a conversation

"When she got married, things started to change. I didn't like her husband very much because she would always tell me how badly he treated her, so being a best friend, I started to dislike this man who hurt my BFF. When her mother died, I took time off work and paid for a flight I couldn't afford so that I could be there with her. Then she told me she wanted to be left alone to process her feelings, so I did that. I would still check up on her once in a while to see if she was ok. Then, almost a year later, I told her I was coming to the city she was living in with her husband for four days and would love to meet. 

She made plans and canceled, then said her husband was sick (he had the flu), so I said, 'Oh sure, I hope he gets well soon.' I don't know what I said was wrong because she blew up and started saying that I was being sarcastic and that she was done with me (keep in mind she was the one who always had issues and picked fights and also kept going to and leaving therapy). So I didn't stop her. I thought I had been through enough toxicity for 15 years with her that I guess I was over it, too. Since then, we have texted each other two times for our birthdays, which was last year. Don't think I'll text her this year, and I don't expect her to text me either."

— radbook27

2. "I had the same best friend from the age of 2 to 19. We were INSEPARABLE. People thought we were sisters because we even grew to look alike. We went through everything together. Then she got this absolute loser of a boyfriend who sold weed. I knew he did because he sold to my housemate on many occasions. This wasn't his only red flag — he was a walking red flag — a real loser. So I gently told her. She called me a liar and believed his BS over me. She believed this loser she had known for a few months over me, her best friend since forever. That day, I walked away and never went back. She's tried several times to reconcile since then, but that bond is too broken for me to continue. She's still with him too, and he's still a loser."

— grumpychef12

3. "My best friend of 40 years had an affair with a co-worker. Apparently, every time she would lie and see him, she told her husband she would see me (we live about an hour apart). I never knew any of this. So when her husband found out, he was pissed at me too."

"Instead of telling him the truth that I had nothing to do with it. She tried to spin it in her favor. She never called to apologize. Instead, she sent a note tucked into a sympathy card she sent when my dad died. That was it for me."

— sportychair82

4. "My friend had two unplanned pregnancies back to back with a bad boyfriend turned fiancée. All the while, she brushed off my three-year struggles with infertility. I finally got pregnant right around the time of her wedding. I couldn't keep up with the financial obligations of being a bridesmaid (bridal shower, bachelorette party, a bridesmaid dress, hotel room at the venue, etc.) I told her I couldn't be in her wedding, but I could attend as a guest, and she told me I should have planned my pregnancy better. She went off the rails after that by calling my mom and telling her I was going to harm myself because I was depressed (I wasn't), body-shaming me and my husband, and calling me a selfish two-faced bitch. I blocked her on all fronts. My only regret was that I didn't end it sooner."

Pregnant person cradling their belly, wearing a blue cardigan

5. "I had a friend for 20+ years that I had to divorce. She got super into conspiracy theories to the point of being aggressive to others who didn’t believe the way she did or if we didn’t want to talk about freaking big pharma every single conversation. I tolerated it for a long time until I couldn’t tolerate it anymore."

— tamarraevanssluga

6. "My best friend — inseparable, bonded by laughter and trauma — met me in the park and presented me with a Google Doc list of complaints about me."

Two women in casual attire sitting and conversing, one holding a smartphone

7. "My breaking point was when I realized how extremely attached she was to me, not in a BFF way but in a codependent way, and would demand my attention at all times. If I were late for something (I'm a married mom), she would make me feel so bad that I’ve cried multiple times over it. I think what set it in was when I found out my dad’s terminal illness had escalated. Her response was to not even look up from her phone but say, 'Ugh, I wish mine would die,' and then cry incessantly that a guy she’d been sleeping with for a few weeks was moving away and didn’t profess his love for her like she thought he would. I had to stop talking to her a few months ago for my mental health, and it’s honestly been nice, and I hope she gets the support she needs that I don’t think anyone can provide."

— giagiagia

8. "I uninvited my two best friends to my wedding (as maids of honor too) after my mother shared a Facebook message conversation with them and another friend that threw a surprise bridal shower for me. My now husband had been telling me for months that they were bad friends, but I didn’t want to let ten years of history go. It was the toughest thing I did, but I didn’t want their toxicity to ruin my special day. They never responded, never apologized, and never reached out. Hardest but best thing I could do for myself."

Person sitting in a dimly lit room, hand on head, expressing contemplation or distress

— ferellannblanc

9. "I told my best friend from kindergarten that my grandmother passed away, and she sent a sad face emoji. That was it. Not even an 'I’m sorry' to go along with it."

— google_102850322362993091708

10. "We are in our 30s now. We had been friends or at least knew each other since first grade. We were the closest in high school. There were always subtle put-downs and being asked these devil's advocate questions regarding issues about my values/worldview, to which I felt she already knew me well enough to know how I would respond. I thought it wasn't ever coming from a place of genuine curiosity — rather more antagonistic. I'm not a fighter, so I let things slide and harbored resentment. The other day, I told her we should take a break after a very small issue, but I feel bad because I never verbalized my feelings in the past about how she has made me feel. So now it might just appear that I'm overreacting. I just feel like I can't put up with it anymore."

— silkyghost333

11. "I parted ways with a friend I’d known since we were in grade school. We did everything together, but she had some real anger management issues and was very vindictive and vengeful. As I got into my late 20s, I realized how much it dictated my mood as well as my relationships with my other friends. They later told me they only 'tolerated' her because they didn’t want to lose or upset me. When this ex-friend got engaged, she asked me to be in her wedding party. Not long after, my fiancé got very sick, and I had to cancel a double date we had scheduled."

"We rescheduled, and then I ended up having to cancel AGAIN because my fiancé was in and out of the emergency room four weekends in a row. Finally, she sent me a text telling me she didn’t think I was being a good bridesmaid and that I wasn’t giving her wedding (or her) the attention she expected — you know, because I was too busy worrying if my now-husband was going to live or die. 

Her message sent me into a tizzy because I couldn’t understand how someone could be so self-centered. I told her I was done with our friendship. She begged me to stay in the wedding party (because the only other person she had was her sister). I told her I’d only be there physically. I haven’t seen or talked to her since her wedding in 2015. However, several months later, she showed up at my engagement party uninvited. Crazy."

— kathleenperoff

12. "This is about my BFF and I of almost 20 years. I flew a few thousand miles to be with her for her birthday after we both moved to different cities, and it was supposed to be a joint birthday celebration because my birthday was a couple of weeks later. We went to Disneyland, the spa, multiple dinners, brunch, etc., over multiple days. I have a degenerative condition, and it started to show but didn't derail our plans that much."

Couple taking a selfie with a crowd and a Disneyland castle in the background

"The last night and morning, she was really mean to me, my partner, and her own partner. She threw a tantrum and wouldn't leave her room. Refused to say why. I've repeated constantly throughout our friendship that my #1 thing was just being upfront and honest, so I assumed it was related to other stresses. Four days later, she said it was because I didn't make her birthday 'special enough' and refused to talk with me or explain. Then she got mad at me for being upset that my spending thousands of dollars and taking time off of work wasn't enough for her."

— witchysquid22

13. "This hits home for me right now. My best friend of 10 years stopped talking to me because their bf (my flatmate, who I set them up with) told me to move out because I have depression. He told me I was bringing his mood down by being sad (alone in my room, not even in shared spaces). This is after a long period of depression brought on by a traumatic experience he knew about. While I was going through this, he did not even ask if I was okay or check up on me. My best friend told me they would always be there for me, and a couple of weeks later, they dropped off the face of the earth with no contact. Meanwhile, the flatmate has been lying about me to everyone he can and participating in online harassment directed at me. Who needs enemies with friends like that? The best part is my best friend has depression too, and if they and their bf ever move in together, I’m certain that a bad breakup will follow. All I have to say is best of luck!"

— anonymous88

14. "My best friend of 20 years got married in 2022. I just now found out. When confronted, she said she thought she told me. She then let me know she was getting a divorce, and I was abandoning her like everyone else. I'm not sure what she expected when she never reached out or wanted to hang out. It's always me trying to talk or see her. It's been like this for years."

— smellyogre17

Did you ever have an experience ending a friendship? If so, share your story with me in the comments below.

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Jessica Grose

A.i. is making the sexual exploitation of girls even worse.

An illustration that includes a photo of a cellphone with a blurred image on its screen.

By Jessica Grose

Opinion Writer

On Tuesday, Kat Tenbarge and Liz Kreutz of NBC News reported that several middle schoolers in Beverly Hills, Calif., were caught making and distributing fake naked photos of their peers: “School officials at Beverly Vista Middle School were made aware of the ‘A.I.-generated nude photos’ of students last week, the district superintendent said in a letter to parents. The superintendent told NBC News the photos included students’ faces superimposed onto nude bodies.”

I had heard about this kind of thing happening to high school girls , which is horrible enough. But the idea of such young children being dehumanized by their classmates, humiliated and sexualized in one of the places they’re supposed to feel safe, and knowing those images could be indelible and worldwide, turned my stomach.

I’m not a technophobe and have, in the past, been somewhat skeptical about the outsize negative impact of social media on teen girls. And while I still think the subject is complicated, and that the research doesn’t always conclude that there are unfavorable mental health effects of social media use on all groups of young people, the increasing reach of artificial intelligence adds a new wrinkle that has the potential to cause all sorts of damage. The possibilities are especially frightening when the technology is used by teens and tweens, groups with notoriously iffy judgment about the permanence of their actions.

I have to admit that my gut reaction to the Beverly Hills story was rage — I wanted the book thrown at the kids who made those fakes. But I wanted to hear from someone with more experience talking to teens and thinking deeply about the adolescent relationship with privacy and technology. So I called Devorah Heitner, the author of “Growing Up in Public: Coming of Age in a Digital World,” to help me step back a bit from my punitive fury.

Heitner pointed out that although artificial intelligence adds a new dimension, kids have been passing around digital sexual images without consent for years. According to a 2018 meta-analysis from JAMA Pediatrics, among children in the 12 to 17 age range, “The prevalence of forwarding a sext without consent was 12.0 percent,” and “and the prevalence of having a sext forwarded without consent was 8.4 percent.”

In her book, Heitner offers an example in which an eighth-grade girl sends a topless photo to her boyfriend, who circulates it to his friends without her permission. After they broke up, but without her knowledge, “her picture kept circulating, passing from classmate to classmate throughout their middle school,” and then “one afternoon, she opened her school email to find a video with her image with sound effects from a porn video playing with it.”

That kind of situation is already sickening, but the creation of fake nude images adds another layer of transgression. In the Beverly Hills case, according to NBC News, not only were middle schoolers sexualizing their peers without consent by creating the fakes, they shared the images, which can only compound the pain.

“If you’re creating an image of someone else and doing it without their consent,” Heitner told me, “whether it’s real or fake, you are violating that person and violating their privacy, violating their safety.” In these situations, she said, girls may feel that their sense of social acceptance has been lost. They may feel a sense of torturous humiliation from not knowing who among their peers has seen these types of images and who hasn’t. In her book, Heitner describes situations in which girls stop going to school altogether.

But Heitner also cautioned against over-punishing the perpetrators when they are younger children. “It’s important to understand that a 12- or 13-year-old is developmentally different than an adult,” she said. While it may be appropriate to suspend that child or move them to a different school if their victims no longer want to be around them, they shouldn’t be indefinitely barred from all participation in school or cast out of society. They are redeemable; they can make amends and become adults who know better. (It should be noted that in the Beverly Hills case, according to NBC News, the superintendent of schools said that the students responsible could face suspension to expulsion, depending on how involved they were in creating and sharing the images.)

Kids need to be better educated, starting in elementary school, about technology and consent before things like this happen. If you think grammar school is too young to learn about such things, remember that these days it’s typical for kids to get their own cellphones at around 11 or 12, and many kids even younger than that have access to a family iPad with image creation and sharing capabilities. As Heitner writes in her book:

Teach your child the importance of never sharing an explicit message or photograph of another person — especially without that person’s consent. Explain to them that regardless of how they came across the explicit image or message, passing it on to someone else is unethical, perpetuates that person’s violation, and is very likely illegal in their state (especially if the image is of a minor).

The relevant laws apply most directly to real photos, though. In some states, A.I.-generated nudes exist in more of a legal gray area. There is no federal law that protects victims of deepfakes, and, according to reporting by Tenbarge and Melissa Chan, “Politicians and legal experts say there are few, if any, pathways to recourse for victims of A.I.-generated and deepfake pornography” — almost all of whom are women, according to a 2019 study. School districts and our legal system need to move quickly to come up with policies that deal with these issues, because they are not going away and they are only going to become more pervasive as technology evolves and proliferates.

Heitner also emphasized the importance of getting to the root of this kind of behavior. “We actually need to lean into teaching kids about empathy and respecting one another’s humanity,” she said, and also look at “the misogyny and homophobia in society that seems to be giving these kids license to bully along these very sort of gendered lines and police one another’s bodies.”

I regularly hear from people who say they’re perplexed that young women still feel so disempowered, given the fact that they’re earning the majority of college degrees and doing better than their male counterparts by several metrics. At a certain level, it’s not that complicated: Girls frequently feel less-than because they know that some of their peers have the impression that they’re allowed to be thoughtlessly degrading. And further, they know that a portion of society values them only as objects . They walk through the world with that weight on their shoulders, and it’s up to all of us to help lift it.

Jessica Grose is an Opinion writer for The Times, covering family, religion, education, culture and the way we live now.

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The life and music of Amy Winehouse, through the journey of adolescence to adulthood and the creation of one of the best-selling albums of our time. The life and music of Amy Winehouse, through the journey of adolescence to adulthood and the creation of one of the best-selling albums of our time. The life and music of Amy Winehouse, through the journey of adolescence to adulthood and the creation of one of the best-selling albums of our time.

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  1. phrases

    My old friend visited me yesterday. My old friend came to visit me yesterday. I have heard English native speakers say both. If both have the exactly same meaning then why would a native English speaker say the second sentence when it is longer? phrases; Share. Improve this question.

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    Dec 23, 2010. #2. Hola Dwarf, I think either way is commonly spoken and heard. However, I would say: I would like you to come visit me at my place. (no specific reference to location) or. I would like you to come to Paris and visit me at my place. (I'd use "to" when speaking about a specific location for the visit to occur.)

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    The short answer is that 'come and visit' is grammatically correct. The reason for this is that 'and' is a coordinating conjunction that is used to join two independent clauses. In this case, 'come' and 'visit' are both independent clauses and 'and' is necessary to join them together. On the other hand, 'come visit' is ...

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    3. Clarity. The dream is not confusing. Whether the person communicates with you through words or actions, the message is clear. Symbolistic dreams that will leave you guessing are not visitation dreams. 4. Positive Behaviour. The person who visits our dreams is healthy, positive, calm, and never sad, sick, or injured.

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    For example, "Come visit me" and "Visit me" can both be used to invite someone to your location. ... "visit" might be used to refer to a person instead of a place. For example, "I'm going to visit my friend in the hospital" instead of "I'm going to see my friend in the hospital". When referring to a short stay: ...

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    It was just the break we needed. #48 My door is always open for you. Thank you so much for visiting me. It means so much to me to know you took time out of your busy life to come to see me. #49 Your visits always make my life better. Thank you so much for coming to see me.

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